Riced Out Yugo
YUGO
YUGO LABS
ALSO WIK
oi m8s
Am my mates seem to have one of these things so i thought i better get one.I am 24 and i am a painter and decorator, I enjoy drinking with my mates and taking the mikkey of of graham marshall.I also enjoy playing snooker and cricket. I am also a mad Carlisle united fan.


Music
abba, Five, Boyzone.

Films
pulp fiction

Sports
football

Scared Of
Graham Marshall and gary masons right foot.

Happiest When
Watching carlisle united. Also happy when playing cricket or drinking with my mates and Wilson.

Gender: Male
Age: 25
Last Active: 2 days
Profile Views: 613 times
Share the Luv: 1
Hometown: keswick
Member Since: May 2006
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2007-12-10 09:11:00
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FUNT FUNT SPACE ECHOEZ
LOL, omg spacer echoes. Local bueinssses centre, and sadd musioc yo7u6 toy uor uadds and shit, ADD MUSIC./ OMG RESONANCE AND CUTOFF, +++!1000 SQUELCH MECHNAICS.

BIG UP < ULTIMATE, FUX

YOYOOYOYY COMEDY EVENIGN. spiced out frugo, the arch nbemsisis. Lol psicey myoguhurrt
Posted by Mahjong The Wisest @ 2007-12-08 19:07:00
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DROP AN OLDSQOOL BEAT
OKAY MY RESPONSE TO YOUR RESPONSE TO MR. THE PLAGUE? HOGWASH. ALL OF IT. HOGWASH. I WAS MY HOGS WITH IT ALL THE FUCKING TIME. I BRUSH MY HOG'S TEETH WITH YOUR REFUTATION. I CAN'T QUITE SEEM TO CONNECT WHY YOU'RE BREAKING THE FUCKING PATTERNS HERE. YOUR INTERNET POLICE IS NOT RESPECTED HERE AT ALL. I CAN'T ALWAYS BE EVERYWHERE AT ONCE, YOU KNOW? I CAN ONLY DO THAT ON LEFT-HANDED TUESDAYS. I CAN ONLY DO THAT AT THE TOP OF THE CLOCK. I CAN SWITCH YOUR FREQUENCIES TO 12. I CAN TOUCH YOUR SHIELDED RADIOACTIVITIES. I BREAK YOUR PRECONCEPTIONS ABOUT MY STOLEN THOUGHTS. I BREAK YOUR PRECONCEPTIONS ABOUT FORM/FUNCTION. I BREAK YOUR PRECONCEPTIONS ABOUT PRECONCEPTIONS. I BREAK YOUR AWIFSJDFKASDFLASKLFMMASD,F,A,SD,FA,SRIEIT TWICE PER MILLION. I COUNT THE EXTRA TWIGS.
Posted by HYPERFUKBOT @ 2007-12-08 05:30:00
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she's blank
like a sheet of paper
nobody can draw on her
things change
the world changes
she stays blank
we all stay blank
Posted by HYPERFUKBOT @ 2007-12-08 05:24:00
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refutation of statements made by Mr. The Plague
this is in response to this post. it came up on the yugo randomizer, and i felt compelled to comment.
  1. it is true that you cannot click a cup or drink a mouse. however, you cannot drink a cup, either - you can only drink what is in it.
  2. jello can store data, if one is clever enough. allow me to posit one such method: a microswitch and jello actuator are placed next to a jello mould. to write a "1" to the jello mould, the jello actuator gives the jello mould a "thwack" (a technical term) and the jello, being jello, sloshes away from the actuator. every action has an equal and opposite reaction, however, and in short order, the jello returns with vigor, delivering the thwack to the microswitch. to write a "0" the jello is simply left unthwacked. thus, the jello can be used as a primitive DRAM cell - storing data, though requiring regular renewal if the data is not to be lost.
  3. how do you know i don't have an external CD drive?
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2007-12-07 16:22:00
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word problems
if 37 shoppers are in a mall and one (1) disgruntled gentleman walks in with a semiautomatic rifle under his sweater, how far into this post can RTQP get before offending people, consequently creating himself a Word Problem?
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2007-12-07 15:52:00
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WHY NOT GET SOMEONE A CAR FOR CHRISTMAS??
why not get someone a car this christmas?? cars make a perfect, unique gift. you can even get a stupid fucking giant bow to tie on it. never mind the fact that, come easter, repo men will be loading that car onto a flatbed semi, due to your inability to make payments... IT'S CHRISTMAS!! don't be a grinch, get in the spirit of the season. drop 30k on a car you can't afford and don't need, on the premise that it will make you happy and pretty like the people in the commercials. how can you resist touching, nostalgic renditions of christmas carols played while interest and annuity terms scroll by? don't think. buy car. purchase happiness, on credit.
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2007-12-07 04:47:00
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about the reverend tedward q. porktanker
the reverend tedward q. porktanker was born with the following special powers:
  • ability to split a hair infinite times (so don't try him)
  • ability to never lose an argument... unless he wants to
  • ability to write yugo posts
  • ability to annoy the hell out of anyone within a 10-metre radius (and some besides)
  • ability to haul ass
  • ability to meta-think
  • ability to forge words and alter language

in addition, through his studies, he has developed the following ninja powers:
  1. power to move silently
  2. power to hold his breath for long periods
  3. power to confuse
  4. power to ingest any level of hallucinogens and have his sanity remain intact
  5. power to trigger chain reactions
  6. power to balance on things
  7. power to confuse household pets

he is currently in search of a new master who can help him develop further ninja powers. the yellow pages have proved unhelpful in this regard.
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2007-12-06 04:58:00
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I'M LOU FUCKIN' DOBBS

IM LOU FUCKIN DOBBS ALL U MEDIA KIRRITICS DON'T UNDERSTAND POLLS U DON'T GET THE FACTS U DON'T UNDERSTAND TEH NUMBERS AND YOU AREN'T LOU FYCKIN DOBBS SO DEAL WITH IT I AM RIGHT AND THE FOLLOWING POLL PROVES IT


Q: Is Lou Fuckin' Dobbs fuckin' right?

1) Yes (40%)
2) Yes (80%)
3) Hell Yes (90%)
4) Only most of the time (2%)
Posted by I'M LOU FUCKIN' DOBBS @ 2007-12-05 06:13:00
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THIS RICED OUT YUGO POST IS NAMED MUHAMMED
one day, some moustacios got muhammered and named a post muhammed. lol.

seriously, i can't believe this is one of the top news stories. NEWSFLASH: THERE IS INTOLERANCE IN THE WORLD!! :O :O :O

i also encourage savvy news-viewers to note that the "barbaric towelheads sentence teacher to 40 lashes and 15 days gang-rape for puttin' down their homey muhammed" story is invariably run before or after a segment involving iran and nukes.
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2007-12-05 06:07:00
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a touching anecdote
this article reminds me of a touching anecdote.

just after columbine happened, i was in front of my math class, writing up my answer to a homework problem on the board. though i was an oft-controversial lad, i was a studious one as well. when the teacher stepped out into the hallway to yell at some other children, i decided to have some fun. i started reworking the word problem in the spirit of the times - "if there are 30 students in a class, and seven are shot..." tasteless, yes, but i refuse to take anything seriously. it's bad juju.

anyways, a fellow named john, who was absolutely dedicated to becoming a cop as soon as he had his high-school diploma in his conservative mitts, became very irate, and began bitching me out. given that he had six inches and 30 lbs on me, i tactfully apologizied.

this was the moment i learned that cops have no sense of humor.
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2007-12-05 05:59:00
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we are the fap generation
we are the fap generation. or generation fap, viewer's choice. we live in world of more porn than we actually want, and have developed a bizarre lingo with which to navigate it. scientists once thought it impossible to have too much porn, but they had not seen goatse, or had precious childhood memories ruined forever via a moment of foolish curiosity. over and over we risk opening pandora's box, when it is not for sale on ebay (because mr. pandora's cock wouldn't fit in it).

we are the fap generation, the bulletin bored. we live in the blogosphere, the forum universe, our islands connected by syndicated black magic. quantum uncertainly reigns supreme - does the internet exist? yes, no, maybe, NO U, STFU n00b - all these are viable, if not arguably correct answers.

memes are the order of the day, and the viral-thought engineers are our new overlords. the fap generation knows serious business when it sees it. all your base are belong to the fap generation. peanut-butter fapping time. ring ring ring banana fap. ninjas vs. pirates vs. fap. leeroy jenkfap. i can has fap generation. fap generation going to teh moon, brb. the fap generation is watching you masturbate. everytime you masturbate, the fap generation kills another childhood memory.

many try to harness the attention and energy of the fap generation - presidential candidates revive decade-old chuck norris email memes, hed-on is applied directly to the cerebellum, and superbad is superyoutubed.

but they fail. though some are duped, most see through these paltry efforts. the would-be harnessers fail to grasp the cornerstone of the fap generation:

we're just here for the porn. show us your tits.
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2007-12-05 05:44:00
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facebook has jumped the shark
get out while you still can
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2007-12-04 06:15:00
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<br>
pigsquickle
existential flooterquob
o
bitblt
exercising is fun and easy
hilary clinton eating your face
hilary clinton eating your soul
hilary clinton biting off your penis
hilary clinton winning an election
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2007-12-04 05:43:00
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paranoia
everybody quiet. they will hear if everybody is not quiet. why are you not quiet?? oh, you want to know who will hear, my friend, i will tell you. sweden will hear. sweden has ears. sweden will see. sweden has eyes. sweden has arms, lions, witches, and wardrobes. sweden grabgrabgrab. sweden cannot be escaped, sweden around every corner. sweden has giant moose. if sweden catches you, sweden will send giant moose. sweden will make you food for moose. moose is handicap friendly. you think i am crazy? you will see i am right, when it is too late, when you are in belly of swedish moose. sweden is everywhere. sweden cannot be escaped. we must watch carefully for spies of sweden. is hotpocket swedish?? no, hotpocket is swiss. is coffee maker swedish?? no, coffee maker is made in taiwan. is sweden swedish? YES!!! RUN FOR IT

Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2007-12-03 09:47:00
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Riced Out Yugo Proudly Gives Kane & Lynch an 11 out of 10
this will be a lesson to me - to follow up on my hunches more often. i saw the television ads for kane & lynch, sadly after my "commercial slogans that weren't" post was written. in fact, i almost did a vol. II, simply because i wanted to rip into this shitware a bit. now i read about the atomic gamer conniption gamespot has caused, and i realize i should have acted on this. it was like when i wrote the post titled "a book report by general betrayus" before the ad was run in the new york times.

so how did i know? before the voiceover glamourizing the drugs and violence aspect of the game kicked in, the first fucking frame of kane & lynch themselves killed it for me. if you are not up on james bond films, i suggest you look at Mr. Wint & Mr. Kidd. when a game's main characters are borrowed from an oft-parodied, 30-year old action film, you have to wonder where they halfassedly lifted the rest from.

suck my tits, eidos. if you want to sign an ad contract with yugo so you can pull it, just drop us a line. also, for the record, i thought the tomb raider series was turd.
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2007-12-03 08:55:00
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FOLKS
FOLKS FOLKS FOLKS FOLKS FOLKS FOLKSFOLSKFOPL,SKF FOLKS FOLKS FOLKSFOLKSFOLKSFOLKSFOLKSFOLKSFOLKS

FOLKS


gods, what a geriatric word that is.
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2007-12-03 08:28:00
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We are going nowhere and everywhere.
(analog hacker extraordinaire)
(analog hraoacker extrdinaire)
(anag hrloaoacker exinairtrde)
(anag hrkeaxrloinaoac eirtrde)
(eaxrlog hrkanaitrdenaoac eir)
(denaoeanaxrlog hrkaitrac eir)
(nanarlog hrkaitr acadeoexeir)
(nanaexec kradhrgitr aaloeoir)
(khananairxcdr goiter areolae)
(anolanacdr hgokiter erxareai)
(anancdrlog hakier exotraaire)
(ananlog hackier exotradraire)
(analog hacker exotrnaidraire)
(analog hacker extraordinaire)
Posted by wolf530 (analog hacker extraordinaire) @ 2007-12-03 01:56:00
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USE COLLECTIVE CODE OWNERSHIP
CREATE SPIKE SOLUTIONS TO REDUCE RISK
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CREATE SPIKE SOLUTIONS TO REDUCE RISK
CREATE SPIKE SOLUTIONS TO REDUCE RISK
ADD JUST-IN-TIME FUNCTIONALITY
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ADD JUST-IN-TIME FUNCTIONALITY
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Posted by HYPERFUKBOT @ 2007-12-02 23:38:00
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Google AdSense in Full Effect

RICED OUT YUGO SELLS OUT.
Posted by Mahjong The Wisest @ 2007-12-02 18:00:00
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