BUY WAT STICKERS!!
for a fatter america
Pringles: For A Fatter America

seriously -- halp. i think i am addicted
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-03-10 11:33:00
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thought nodule
a dearth of octomom tonic. mysterious vagina-shaped couch. i see what you fucking did there. i've seen these things on the internet, in the last thirty seconds or so. who knows what the next minute will bring? am i a sponge or a sieve, today? another tite squeeze. remember mp3.com? no? i don't either. electro auto disco beat, always keep the electro suweete. asdhjkaskdhjasjk futz. i could feel the stuff starting to work on my jawbone. my angle with respect to reality began to take on a series of rhythmic, itchy tingles. i started to develop political feelings regarding orange juice. my third arm disappeared, leaving me with only two and a buick. but, well, the doctor told me that would happen. i am splitting into red and blue components. red goes to work while blue plays xbox. green stays in the capsule, airlock shut, to maintain smoke density, sonic acuity, and kick drum thudd. also writes yugo post for peanut. lisbon thudd. meeennnnarhgkl. trickle. duck. QUACK!~2 nevlsa nevilelsemkls ks[pd wossszd. sauce
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-03-09 08:08:00
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the military comes and goes; yugo remains the same
the military as portrayed in james bond movies
the military as portrayed in james bond movies
the military as portrayed in james bond movies
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-03-05 11:24:00
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Quaftical Tankertude
Cozz eye got soitified soitifficatte 2 tap datp shitzz maiyurao, 4 sure eye dew. lens melons across the zapes aof zimbable. turkeys! on themount. are they a planned part of the shopping experience? is it merely because visiting shoppers provide bread for gobble? or is there a deeper conspiracy at work? sjkldfjlsd;jkflsd kaput.
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-03-03 19:51:00
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i can't stick to any particular paradigm very long, it would seem
my weasel is an easel/smear some paint just like vin diesel. my tank is a plank; it's just like a yank. my yak is hack, but i awarded him a plaque. my glue is blue, but still use it i do. my hat is a bat and just flew away, at that. my rhymes are chimes, ringin' out good times. my lenses are those of all menses, bustin' barriers, eatin' defenses. fffffffffffffffing ya.
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-03-03 19:39:00
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∫(goop)=ln(yule/z^3)+c; c=(goop)+(.2348329i)
Haween!
eafkn pictupump
Posted by Pet'ctlyptem Xon Yihaa'qti WchwaaXaan @ 2010-03-02 22:40:00
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Í
12398129-412893-1293812-39124-01284102-12
Posted by Pet'ctlyptem Xon Yihaa'qti WchwaaXaan @ 2010-03-02 22:34:00
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pillar of holy unity
get away from my children right now or else i will call the fucking police do you know what time it is mister its is really late very late you should be in bed by now dont you know anything

i am not very happy with you you know that dont you you had me worried sick half to death you should be more careful you little slippery dickens oh look there is richard d james how lovely i am happy i could share this moment with him

<---disregard this
Posted by Pet'ctlyptem Xon Yihaa'qti WchwaaXaan @ 2010-03-02 22:26:00
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two turntables
Posted by Mr. The Plague (mastar of teh gibson) @ 2010-03-02 05:01:00
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and we could use some ointment
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-02-27 07:11:00
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the last view in your short fuckijn lyfe
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-02-27 06:59:00
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lost bob dylan song (maybe)
i'm outta cranberry,
i ain't got cranberry,
i want some cranberry,
cranberry juice.

but i ain't got cranberry,
i'm outta cranberry,
and i want some cranberry,
cranberry juice.
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-02-27 01:53:00
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RICE TIME INCIDENT
Twisted windy valvekirken, god damn it I need to make some rice already and I just sat down. I'm serious about this, as soon as I started writing this post I remembered I wanted to make some rice so I could use the peanut sauce before it became inedible peanut sauce. Then I realized how interesting it was to have the desire to write a yugo post, and the desire to make rice, combine. the background image right now is some really weird picture with a lot of jargon-class widgetry and a guy's head in a foam square squisher. tiger-print arm clutches additional camera. christ is it ever rice time
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-02-26 23:40:00
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Tmrsenlrterioultredthnevistoeuaneiscdseaelnsuxhiiugarlcfisifuft. Tenhrctoecehracwice. Tfhoibcotielacitinerhhcesrscomfadrlelhuutcfthtee. Trhutnwntairgrsicahoosllahwateorhfooestihsowalrfirlstceeurilpiaioefochploapte. Tnhoetiidocn. Tseaetvresariarntgancihooittvcdr. Tuxekan. Taephhcaadnsdmxutueoonkinnyemssrtrknlefiterhoe. Teicrormeshitfrsemahaeresehuuqstchstem. Tiemcotnsillhhrhieoiwd. Teeoseeeshmenggwioaoxiesstrnnlmihogreomhbrikdbinplicexesaenit. Tlseooeehtgdehehanrhadreaomefcipgogleadeltphimrwnobcrfnyeleraoeifdciairiwdvgtifirnanracer.

Posted by Pet'ctlyptem Xon Yihaa'qti WchwaaXaan @ 2010-02-18 22:19:00
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the incredible confusing letter h
some fine examples i've prepared earlier:
  • swirxh
  • squance crossswitch
  • singh sandwich
  • singh her show her
  • hhaughtuhyuthzth
  • hathathathathathhatttt t t
  • the houghtful
  • lea her sea her
  • ayhhthyhtghtghully
  • hathahthathathathhhttaththathatatataataataaaa
  • slaxyh

eh ned of lie hine.
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-02-18 18:22:00
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2 fat, 2 fly
2 fat 2 fly
too fat to fly
2 fat, 2 fly
2 fat 2 fly2 fat 2 fly
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-02-16 15:18:00
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TELLURIDE
ls0i dk4hh dsjd8jd89 THIS IS ALAN GREENSPAN REPORTING LIVE AND DIRECT FROM
THE NORTHERN FRINGES. TOUR OF FRANCE FOR $4.
RECYCLE COTTON INTO PORTABLE DATACENTERS
TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT
A MAN IS EMERGING FROM THE CHAOS
LADIES AND GENTLECREATURES
TELEPROMPTER IS MALFUNCTIONING.
ALL CIRCUITS LOCKED
THIS IS GOING
TO COST YOU!

END OF TRANSMISSION
Posted by wolf530 (analog hacker extraordinaire) @ 2010-02-16 02:12:00
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DMT
Test:hummMM DING tesselation tesselation UNCHARACTERISTIC FLORAL MOTIF!! ::{wise sage remembrancer} sits on moss like one of the proud insect philosophers of Callisto::_–—fading. ::[initial taste date recall vector]=14/7/1999; COORDINATE=44°36'5.83"N,74°58'5.21"W; LOCATION=Postwood Beach, Hannawa Falls, Pierrepont County, New York, USA, Earth, Sol, MW, Virgo; SUBJECT: mineral taste of Raquette River water::—–_
Posted by Pet'ctlyptem Xon Yihaa'qti WchwaaXaan @ 2010-02-14 02:42:00
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d

01001101 01000100 01000101 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01111000 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01111000 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01111000 01001101 01000100 01000001 01111000 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000001 01111000 01001101 01010100 01000001 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01111000 01001101 01010100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000001 01111000 01001101 01000100 01000001 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000001 01111000 01001101 01010100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01111000 01001101 01000100 01000001 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01111000 01001101 01000100 01000001 01111000 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01111000 01001101 01010100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01010100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000101 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01111000 01001101 01010100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01000100 01000101 01100111 01001101 01000100 01000001 01110111 01001101 01010100 01000001 01111000 01001101 01

Posted by Pet'ctlyptem Xon Yihaa'qti WchwaaXaan @ 2010-02-14 01:29:00
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A COMPILATION
pupie zre zo ceru kiuyete its is so crzy man I'm sjust sitinting er in my hoe just thinking: man il ove puipies ad its e sorekickni cray if there was just like a froclikin pupies all here and whatnvort.omg you just be like aomg taooke a PUPIES AROMA TET ARESO CUTE AND FUZZY AND HAPPY AND ITS JSUT beautiful its gonna be such a happy hoiday season everybod is ggona be warm and cozay with the crhistamas treses and presenrts and jesus and sants and its so un OMG WE COULD BE LIKRAE IN A DSNOW AND REUN ADROUND AND THEN Geoa ice scakingt like in chrelis brwon. ANYWAY ta there swas this psuppies and I was likje "OMG THIS APEUPIES SI SO CUTE ITS BSUT CRAZYE"!! I'M AB MAN ABOUT TOWN W=RIGHT NOE!@!! i you lok at me you be like whAT HE TALKING ABOUT I tell you wahat i'm taling about: tit is the year 1955 na dlife is swell, I have a widfe and two kids life is swell my kids are so fun my wife is a wonderful person, I javve a stable jobn at the schemical factority!! my house is a modern 4bedreoom house and boy i it freat my wife she make tulip garden and we have lotsa PUPPIES AND THE BLOCKPEOPLE INCEOPRORATED LIKES ME TO BE HAPPY SO THEY GIVE ME PUPIES OMG SE THERW AS THIS PUPIE THE OTHER DA AND IT WAS HUSKY DOG PUPP AND I SAID "OMG I WHAVE ENER SEEN A CUTER PUPPY THAN THAT!!!!" AND THEN TH EOWNDER SMILED AT ME IAND I WAS Hapyp oma chicken just appereda in m hosue anywahys froge ttht about that, anyway so I as in the tore an they ahad these little sweateres ofr for pupies and said OMG OMG OMG I NEED ONE OF THEM FOR MY PPEIS AND ITS WAS FREAT omg you don't evnek onw how awesome pupies are. i just love tea so mch. i f i saw a puppt ari eignt now then I was would just be like OMAG OD I LOVE TOU PPERUPY sp ,icj fpor ;iolem234092834 yrsts!@!
Posted by Pet'ctlyptem Xon Yihaa'qti WchwaaXaan @ 2010-02-14 00:44:00
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µµ∆µµ∆µ∆µ∆µµ∆∆∆µ∆µ∆µ∆µ∆µ∆µ∆∆µ∆µ∆∆∆∆∆∆∆µµ∆µ∆µ∆µ∆µµµ
Hi there, my name is Kim Farah, and I will be filling in for Pet'ctlyptem today. I thought maybe typing in lower caps, (and of course, developed syntax) for a change could perhaps lessen the often quite inane and over-excited persona given off by this timeless character we've all come to love. Anyways, I'd like to take this moment to talk about the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.
Posted by Pet'ctlyptem Xon Yihaa'qti WchwaaXaan @ 2010-02-14 00:35:00
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heavy-handed rug advertisement
parchance thee happen upon an eloquent banana, thrice thine picklesnatcher be blessed, for thee tankard doth overflow with the riches of arabian rugs at unbelievably low prices. legends tell of such wonders, hap'd upon by bargain seekers of yore. but, terribly is the man that picks his nose after sunset, for the three-armed god watka watches disapprovingly. newark pintos and all sorts of almighty magical flash meted out with that typically overstated divine justice. pick your nose after sunset? death. scratch your balls during prayer? death. masturbate? death. so, you understand when we say that you'd better not miss out on these deals.
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-02-13 14:49:00
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spin, spin, spin, $10
THIS IS YUGO NEWS FFROM TH EINTERNETTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

here in the tcpiptubes we are reporting on the maximal funt of mulholland (no hay banda) and the minimalistic markov process ('ho foods)

in helvetica news, the comic sans attacked serif forces on the border of Baes Lian. Descenders of the counter forces declined to comment.
Posted by Mr. The Plague (mastar of teh gibson) @ 2010-02-13 13:02:00
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unnamed concept
this shit is harping on a major blob. i'm reconstructing some complicated fractals -- the projections are ballin outta control, as hyperfukbot might say. it's hard to write this out as a properly multifaceted sentence. my concept is a nebulous, multi-colored cloud of something-or-other contained within some sort of 3D geometric structure, but i don't have a proper word for it. i'm forced to employ drastic analogies like the previous, making them work long hours without overtime pay or health benefits. if someone can get me a good line on 80s shirts, let me know.
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-02-13 10:59:00
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black box foto sesh
digital felt, post it to the internet withj hot glue. i want telephotos, but the charging demands it. electronic devices can be so confusing. monolithic constructions of atoms, juggernauts aside carbonides. a machine that makes books.
Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-02-13 01:33:00
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