You may have heard about a ROY. Across time, there have been numerous ROY's. Roy C. Gerbil. Roy the town. Homey G. Roy.

This ROY, however, is a Hamburglar of a different stripe.

Yes, while the innocence of the archetypical Hamburglar was proved in the Mystery of the Missing French Fries, this ROY is unproved. Ergo, this tome shall attempt to demonstrate the full capability and awe-inspiring flatulent power of this web site.

Is this ROY more than mockery of a tricked-out Yugoslavian beater? Yes. Yes, and yes*. While such subjects provide a good pedestal of launching +3, other sources of propulsion are required for the long haul on the ever-demanding World Wide Wart.

Put loosely, ROY is a loose fellowship between three "comedic" asshats, one of which is myself. What do we bring to the table? I think this question is best answered with a classical logical thought experiment: the grandmother test. In the grandmother test, it is described how we each react to meeting your beloved grand-maternal unit. So:

1. I, the Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker, will make fun of your grandmother.
2. Dolt45 will scare your grandmother.
3. fuckle will blow up your grandmother.

What can we conclude from this experiment? I think it is safe to say this web site won't be regarded as "family-friendly," once we get some content up. In fact, it is more than likely that it will viciously mock and offend some people, in language unfit for wholesome prime-time bore-fests.

When a muse (A rutabaga?) speaks to one of us (and real-life situations permit), an article or other such amusement shall be typed and/or scrawled in crayon, then posted here for public (that's PUBLIC, not pubic) enjoyment. In short, we're like a blog that outright refuses to suck. Excelsior!

Once the development stage is done, this web site shall support numerous features: in addition to the articles, we plan to have an article comment system, trackback, and forums.

For ROY to make the optimal impression on your mind, it is recommended that you do such things as "learn to take a joke" and "learn what the fuck sarcasm means." You know, things your neighbor Jed has steadfastly refused to do, much to your chagrin.

What should you do now? You should spread the word about this particular ROY. You should contribute to discussions in the forum. You should check ROY regularly. Oh, and you should congratulate fuckle on his purchase of a cactus.

* Did I miscount the questions, here? My up arrow is broken, and I can't fix it until the next gub'ment check comes.