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| YUGO |
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YUGO LABS |
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| Riced Out Cellar Door | |
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A conversation in the style of Jane Austin Dr. Arturius Qewpie steps into the office of Lord Argyle the 9000th. "Excuse me sir, were you blowing your nose or sharpening a pencil, from down the hallway the distinction was indistinct." "No sir, I was not." "What were, then?" "I know nothing of the sort and I'm far too busy for this particular line of questioning. I suggest you turn your cape and vacate my office immediately unless you have pertinent business worth conducting." "My cape is incapable of vacillation, hence my assumptions upon visitation. I can conduct orchestras, but not businesses. There are far too many egos involved." "Shall I summon security? Must we maintain this facade any longer? My patience with you is growing quite thin, Mr. what's-his-face, if that is your real name." "That's DOCTOR what's-his-phace, thank you, how dare you spell it with an F. by the looks of you, you can't be more than level 12, and you have to be level 27 to summon security guards of high enough level to cave my skull in." "Bullocks! Can't you see that I'm distraught after a amphibious dingo ate my baby in the seas of Narnia and that I'm just trying to commit myself to simple tasks? I beg of thee to express your intentions before like a twitching vessel at the bottom of the ocean I shall become a nervous wreck!" "If you're having trouble COMMITing, as a doctor, I would suggest you check your SQL syntax. In any case, I am collecting statistics on sonic decoding, in the name of conducting an investigation, on authority of grand dutchess skeet ulrich, to determine the feasability of determining what is going on, from the sounds which eminate from those goings-on." "I see! Why did thoust nayeth mention the dutchess in the first place? We could have avoided this rigmarole alltogether. Is there anything I can do to further your completion efforts? Perhaps wipe down your cape or provide a teaspoon of refined beet sugar?" "I require only putty. Lots of putty." "I have no putty and I'm perturbed by your pervish desires of the forbidden material deemed recreational by the provincial government of the Isle of Man! The dutchess would never employ someone who works with putty. This I know for a fact!" "Don't knock it till you've tried it, as he who denies it, supplies it... Though the Dutches Queen would be mighty mean, if you were to report it... let's just keep this our little secret, here, let us snort it." |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2008-08-18 10:50:00 | |
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