|
I TRAVELLED INTO THE /DEV/NULL/ AND RETUNRED. IT WASS A LONNG ADN ARDORS JOURNY FILLED WITH MANY UNTOLD SPELLING MESTEAKS. I CUOLD NOT BEAR TO SEE the ENDLESS NULL. IT WAS 2 PETABYTES IN DEPTH, I ONLY MADE IT THROUGH THE FIRST 3 GIGS. I BARELY MADE IT OUT ALIVE, AS I WAS FACEd WITH 5 TRIALS. THE FIRST TRIAL OF THE 7BIT PLAINTEXT CRYPTODRAGON. HE had 11 HEADS. I HAD to USE MY STATISTICAL FREQUENCY ANALYSIS (BUT FIRST I TRIED THE ROT13 AND XOR BUT it DIDN'T REALLY WORK) AND FINALLY JUST BRUTEFORCED THE MOTHAFUCKA. THE NEXT WAS the FACELESS DEPTHS of THE CAVES OF ENDLESSLY REPEATING NULL CHARACTERS. I JUST GOT LUCKY WITH THAT ONE I GUESS, BECAUSE AFTER ABOUT 17 YEARS I FOUND MY WAY OUT. I TRAVELED A SHORT TIME THROUGH THE PLAINS OF FORGOTTEN DATA, INVISIBLE PARIS HILTON PORN VIDS THAT you THOUGHT YOU DELETED, WHEN I FINALLY FOUND THE NEXT TRIAL: THE GHOST OF CHARLES BABBAGE, 19TH CENTURY COMPUTER SCIENTIST. MR. BABBAGE HAD A 23-BLADED DIFFERENCE ENGINE OF DEATH READY FOR ME. I HAD A 29-BLADED POCKET CALCULATOR OF MOBILE ANALYTICAL DEATH READY TO COUNTER THIS. HE DID NOT STAND A CHANCE VERSUS my SUPERIOR TECHNOLOGY, HOWEVER HIS GREAT INTELLECT AND ETHEREAL FORM WOUNDED ME. I STILL HAVEN'T ENTIRELY RECOVERED MY LEAST SIGNIFICANT BITS, AS YOU MAY HAVE NOTICED. THE NEXT TRIAL WAS THE DIGITAL REPRESENTATION OF CTHULTHU. i JUST SNUCK PAST ME, HE'S REALLY OLD AND CAN'T HEAR TOO GOOD. I WENT TO THE next MAP. THE FINAL TRIAL WAS THE SHADOW VERSION OF MYSELF, LIKE FROM ZELDA31. YOU KNOW, SHADOW HYPERFUKBOT. I HAD TO use MY FLASHLIGHT AND THEN HE WAS PWNT. NOOB. I FINALLY FOUND THE TRUE SECRET, THE BEAUTIFUL SIGINT. I USED THE SIGINT TO FREE MYSELF AND REACH THE TRUE WORLD. I AM RETURNED. HELLOS.
|
