Today is the last day of the first days of the End of Days. Consider yourself warned.
Also, consider buying dehydrated asparagus stalks. In bulk. You won't regret it.
Additionally, in an alternate timeline (one in which we did not post this message), James "Drywall" McKimmey will be conceived tonight in a Plymouth Grand Voyager. He would have grown up to cure cancer, but Paul McKimmey will waste too much time reading and contemplating this post. He'll be late for his date with Jane Allister, who will throw soda on him when he finally shows up. She will storm off and never speak to him again, making the birth of little Drywall impossible. So Paul, since we know you're reading this - great job, asshole. You're already too late, but we know you're going to try to make it anyway. Just be sure to bring a towel.
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